w/e u do, Dont get bak with the guy. because he obiestly is being selfish and dont care about ur family.

wow that is one hell of a problem! if it were me i would come clean to my family and lay all of your feeling out to your parents so there wouldn’t be anything your ex could say to them that they wouldn’t already know. you should come clean to your mother and it’s not your fault that your father did that to you. what he did was horrible but you have to break this cycle. wouldn’t you want your child to come to you if someone molested him/her? this so called boyfriend of yours is a loser and you deserve better. my prayers are with you. good luck.

If this man that you believe you ‘fell in love’ with, would do or even attempt to do anything like this, he doesn’t love you! And let him know that in no uncertain terms.

If he is threatening you, this IS NOT a man you want to be with. Sounds like he has some very strange tendencies that I for one would not want to be involved with.

This is a form of emotional blackmail! You have enough on your plate without having to contend with this maniac!

Think about it.

Clearly he doesnt really love you. Or he would understand and wait. Like you said he obviously is insecure, yet that is no reason to behave as he is.
Dont go back to him, if you do he will always be blackmailing you with this subject knowing it to be your weakness.
I cant see that he will write the letter, does he even have your mums address?
If he does you will be able to deal with it, either say the truth or lie tell your family he is a nutter and that is why he has done this and youre staying away.
You are a strong woman clearly and he is very jealous of that, dont give in if not for you for your childrens sake.

People say and do many things out of anger. The only thing I can tell you is to take it one day at a time. That is black mail. If it is not a lie than tell him to do what you got to do. Do not raise your temper in front of him because that is what he wants you do. He feels that he has an advantage over you if he knows what pushes your buttons and what you are afraid of. Be as calm as possible in front of him. Next time he threatens you say okay calm me when you get through emailing her.(In a calm voice.) The most important thing when going through difficult situations is never letting the other person see you sweat! Sometimes you have to deal with things eventually sooner or later. If your mom finds out tell her you are at peace. Maybe his punishment is being on a feeding tube and going through cancer. Tell her the only thing we can do is take good care of him in the end of his days. Remember that good deeds go unnoticed.

I am really sorry, you seem to be in quite the bind. However, you may not be. Your mother is 74 yrs old, and this man is saying he will write her a letter by e-mail and tell her the truth if you don’t come back to him. A fairly simple conclussion. Get your mothers pass word to her e-mail account. Check it a couple times daily and get to the letter before she does. You can also reply to the letter IF or WHEN it even comes. In a manner where he will think that your mother wrote it. Then you can decide if he is *still* the one for you, which I sincerely hope not, any man that acts that way with threats of any sort, has issues………. MAJOR issues. And are not healthy for you or your children.

As far as telling your Mother, I wouldn’t. She is up there in age, your Father is dieing, and you have seem to deal with and get through the trauma of it all………in your own way, but you did get through. I am really proud of you, that takes one heck of a strong person to get themselves through that.

As far as your children go. They may not need to know that it was your Father who hurt you in that way, but I would let them know that it happen to you, and that you understand the feelings involved in something like that happening. And that if it EVER happen to them, that they can trust you, and they can tell you, and come to you for comfort, understanding and protection. They can come to you for help………. if and when help is needed. I too was hurt in that way…….. and my 3 yr old when she is older, will know, and she will know that it is ok to talk to me, to tell me, that I will not judge her or place blame on her, and that she will be safe and protected by me. She will know that I will understand, because I was hurt in that way.

I pitty a man that ever hurts my child. I was only a baby, but I am now an adult, and I have more instincts of protecting and sheltering, and doing what it takes, then I ever did as a child. I have more strength and power and muscle now…. and want my child to know, she doesn’t ever have to fear idle threats from anyone……… because I will protect her at all costs.

Just words from a mother who was too weak as a child to fight back, and too scared of her mother to tell. Blessed be……….

honey why would you want someone like him, he is worst then your father . that’s not love using your most inner most hurtful secret against you. why would you even want to consider the non friendship because a real best friend under no circumstances would do that to a friend. look you should have been told on your dad , but you decided to hide the truth and i pray you found your peace and I’m sure you felt comfortable telling your so called best friend ( and believe me he’s not ) and for him to use this most trying experience in your life to hold you to him is just nasty plain nasty and if he could not understand your daughter comes first then he is really just out for him self and honey you of all people do not need that so you should tell your family because you don’t want it coming from him and please cut that loser and i mean loser to the curb he is a monster and you should not even want to be any where near him stay gone and never come back if you love your daughter then you would stay away what would he tell your daughter about you when he gets mad you don’t want to know so keep it moving and leave him alone lol and good luck