Confidential Drug Rehabilitation

Please do not tell me what i should have done to remain a virgin… I know good and well .i lost my virginity it at 14 1/2 after sept 11 to be exact… lot of things contributed… bad advice, fear of the world ending and it not being something i experienced, and low self-esteem. later i lost both of my parents a year apart of each other.

I try to stop but i do it for the false companionship…. sometimes i try to keep one partner to cut down on the numbers but i lose interest quick and find another. I have been hurt by many of them and only 5 meant anything to me. I do it to releave stress but i do get depressed and regret it but i cant seem to say no.. i day dream about sex and notice that one of the first things i do when i meet a guy is judge on how good it would feel to be with them sexually.

I’ve had only 2 longterm relationships… and very faithful but when im not in a relationship i cant control myself
* telling myself it isnt right.. i am worth more … etc. does not work trust i am about to be an insurance agent. Im an orphan who takes care of my younger sis and her daughter and live in a townhouse. get paid nicely. am very beautiful and talented. But i cannot control my impulse to have sex! and i wanna stress impulse because i really think that i do it just to do it. I wanna be loved having no parents leaves a big emotional gap and i wanna fill it but how can i do that if i cant resist sleeping with someone before i get them to really know me. I again wanna say i dont think i have low self esteem i just really cant say no to sexual situations and i sometimes create them… I should get help right? am i alone?
* My parents know i was not a virgin i told them.. we were very close yes they wer disappointed. but bottomline was they were there for me. IMy father did tell me that i need to be careful that a sexual addiction runs in the family( i actually have an uncle with 26 kids/ 6 being from his current wife) could this be what is happening. is this a part of my heritage or did his words subconsciously stay in my mind and trigger this behaviour
lmao not a fear of the world ending! when i lost it.. that was one of the reasons .. seems dumb but i was still a child:(

Clicking advertisements helps keep this site running. thank you!

My sweetheart says he needs time to be alone to conquer alcoholism. And he hopes God will bring us back together. He isn’t going to aa meetings or counseling. Just works almost 7 days a week-12 hour days running an auto business. i too am in the business. I have joined my gym again,am working out, and going to therapy. no more drinking or smoking. I Listen to “the Secret” tapes and dvd and feel so positive an no longer blame myself for his emotioal aggrivations to me. My question is…why does he not want my help or to be with him? Can he cure himself sitting at home each night alone???
God Bless You Both..

Clicking advertisements helps keep this site running. thank you!