My best friend, her husband and their son are staying with me for now and her husband is an alcoholic. I didnt realize how bad he was until about two weeks after they moved in. I had put restrictions on his allowed alcohol but he constantly sneaks more into the house and hides it from me to keep me from fussing at him about it. I have tried talking to him and her about the fact that I dont like my children seeing him drink all the time or seeing him drunk almost every night but its not doing any good. Its to the point now that even my friends dont want to come over and visit because they dont like being around him. We have argued over the point of his drinking and he has even admited he has a problem but says he is not going to stop drinking for anyone. Now my husband says that I have to put my foot down and tell him he either stops or he has to leave. This close to christmas I hate to see anyone without a home, even someone with this kind of problem, but I cant deal with it anymore.
To clarify why i have to handle it, my husband works out of town and is rarely home, I allowed them into the home and its my responsibility to handle the situation. I just dont know how to tell my best friend her husband has to go. She has told him if he doesnt straighten up and he has to leave she wont be going with him because she will not have her son without a home because of his dads stupidity. He has lost and quit job after job and its because of his drinking they are in this situation. How do i talk to her without sounding crass or causing to much hurt? Do I go directly to him or just talk to her and let her deal with it? I am just so confused, I have never had to deal with this before and never thought I would have to.

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