March 14, 2010 admin 9 comments

well,me and my fiancee is goin to wed on the next 4 months.both of us are soo excited!bcause this is what we’ve been waiting for.the prob is,my dad family doesnt like my fiancee.whom i’ve been with for more than 7 years.my fam told me that the reason why they don’t like him,is bcause he came from different family background .his parents divorce when he was 13,and since that time,he lives by himself.then about his rehab story!i know he used to be a very bad guy,who grown up without anyone!
what should i do?i do love him soo much

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Written by daryne1999 about 2 years ago.

Marry his parole officer instead
Written by topgal about 2 years ago.

You dont have to prove anything to anyone or do anything you dont want to do. You love each other and this will make you strong. Your family would find a fault with whom ever you chose to marry. Let them know how much you love each other and that no matter what you are going to marry, this is something they will have to accept.
Written by sk8er boi about 2 years ago.

marry him!!!! its about who you love, GOOD LUCK!!
Written by Bubbles about 2 years ago.

You have to do what makes you happy. If your guy has turned his life around and is now a good guy then commend him for that. The past is the past. Everyone makes mistakes. If he is good to you and you to him, then by all means get married. Don’t give up your 7 year love due to your families problem. They should accept him because you do. Forgive and forget! Best of luck.
Written by slimfastshady2002 about 2 years ago.

If you’ve been with him for over 7 years your family must see that you are serious about each other.Just because he came from a different background doesn’t make me a bad person and everyone has a past and as long as it is in his past what can they do? How old are you?Has he ever hit you? been bad to you?, after 7 years there must be something so i say live your life for you and be happy your family will always be there. How come now there been funny about it is it because of the wedding do you have any kids?You have to live your life and be happy and if this man makes you happy them go for it answer the questions I’ve put to you and think about it if you answer no to them then go for it and i hope you are happy in your life.Hope that’s been a help GOOD LUCK
Written by nursecracker about 2 years ago.

your dad would not be the person to marry this guy… and wouldn’t have to live with him… he is being protective of you, and trying to sway your decision… sometimes parents can see bad things coming before we do…

you didn’t mention your age, either.

you can’t live on love alone, although it’s nice you have someone to love.

step back and take a good, hard look at this man before you marry him (or before you marry anyone!)… do you have the same plans and life goals? have you discussed finances, children, where you will live and how you will live? is he a slob? does he have habits you can tolerate for years and years and years?

if you haven’t known this guy for more than 1-1/2 years, don’t marry him yet. give it time. apparently he is an addict, and you really need to see if he’s committed to not using anymore…

and you probably need to learn something about addiction. addiction is an illness – and – addicts aren’t always “very bad guys”… they are people like you and me, who USUALLY have underlying emotional problems and/or mental illness.. (fact). I have been involved with addicts and alcoholics (recovering) and they come from all walks of life and circumstances… and most have had problems which led to drug use.

many people DO recover and go on to lead productive lives. i hope this is the case with your boyfriend.

give things time… take care of YOU. i’m glad you’ve found someone you care for.
Written by Zero about 2 years ago.

Romeo and Juliet you aren’t. But, if you plan on marriage, then take the steps to show your parents that you can provide for yourselves. You’re parents probably think that you’ll be living out of van selling meth and popping out kid after kid, you just need to show them that it’s not the case. On the other hand, this isn’t the 30’s and you don’t need their blessing.
Written by juliet n about 2 years ago.

what i think u should do is just pray and see what happens.i really don’t understand why some parents are still looking at background this day.well that is,if that is d only reason why ur parent dont want u to get married to that person.cause most times out can see somethings when sitting which we can not see even while standing.and u said he use to be a very bad.does that mean he has changed.well most we get married thinking the men will change but i bet u they will never change only female change after married.i think u need to draw closer to God to direct u.
Written by James about 2 years ago.

Not knowing the specific details about your partner makes it difficult to say you should do one thing or another. However, maybe it would be best to shift your perspective a bit. Instead of weighing your decision based on how you feel relative to your family’s input, you might want to pay closer attention to how you really feel about your partner. Emotion for another person, especially for a mate, can cloud your ability to listen to the voice within, if not completely overshadow it. Try setting your personal emotions aside for a moment. Evaluate how you feel when your partner is near you. Do you feel drawn to that person? When your partner expresses himself, for example, in an argument, what do you feel inside? There are three main categories that people fall into. Most will fall into the middle category. They are: Positives, Neutrals and Negatives. Anyone can have a bad day, so pay particular attention to how you feel when your partner is having one of those dreaded moments. Since negative people can mask themselves very well and appear to be positive, you may never really know what they really are inside until it is too late. If you feel any negative feeling within yourself or any hesitation , then it may be a wake up call to the possibility that you are disillusioning yourself with your own perception and emotion. If you feel not much of anything, then it is likely that your partner is generally a positive or good person. Using this as a guide and then paying attention to your family’s input, you will be able to better understand if your family is on to something you do not see. Otherwise, it is possible that your family is just making a knee-jerk reaction to information concerning your partner that has nothing to do with WHO or What he is. Life experience does not necessarily mean or translate to mean that your partner IS as defined by his experiences. It only means that he made choices at points in his life that led him to experience certain events along a path based on that choice. If during those experiences he had chosen to do the right thing despite personal cost and finally ended up meeting you, who are we to judge? Ultimately, the choice is yours. If after serious evaluation you conclude he’s right for you, then make your decision and accept your new common paths and all that will come while experiencing it. Of course, respect your family and their input, but let them know you are willing to accept your choice and that they should respect you regardless of the outcome. If you make the right choice for yourself, your forthcoming experiences will be proof of it. They will see it and possibly change their minds. Good luck!

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