I used to tkae alot of pills when i was younger when out partying,sniff some coke and smoke large amounts of weed. I went through a very low depressive stage. I then met a great guy who took my mind off it all completely,for about 10 months i touched nothing and then fell back into a small circle i used to go out with… For about 4 months now i have been sniffing coke behind my partners back, and the guilt is killing me, my partner works nights so i am often left alone at home, so i then meet somebody to do a bit of coke with, at the time it seems a great idea, a small buzz, but then once i have done it, i feel like my old depressed self again, and my partner doesnt deserve to be lied to, i would love to come clean, but i am embarresed of being seen as weak, as my partner is so strong. I am a very easily led person… and need alot of help… so please any suggestions you can give will help… feel free to let rip at me because, i know what i am doing is wrong, but the drugs just seem to pull me.. I cant go to rehab, encase i loose my job, i have a good job and very career minded… its like im living a secret life????

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